Catching Up

It seems like this fall has flown right by. There are a couple of reasons for that:

• I am pregnant (right now 34 weeks so). I had forgotten how pregnancy is a kind of time warp of keeping track of weeks, frequent doctor's appointments and lots of glorious naps. We're (baby and I) both doing well. Baby is measuring right on target and has been head down for the last several appointments. I might be in a little bit of denial about just HOW pregnant I am. For the longest time and still occasionally I keep thinking, but I'm not all that far along. Now, I'm that far along - we only have six weeks to go!
• During this time I completed my yoga training. This has long been a goal of mine and I am so proud of myself for finishing it. I look forward to continuing to learn and grow as a teacher, but the first major step is done. The year-long training experience was amazing - a wonderful opportunity for personal growth and reflection. I had moments of doubt throughout, but I am so glad I did it.
• We have done several really fun family things this fall - hiking in southeast Ohio, pumpkin picking, apple picking, days at various parks and fall festivals. Milo is such a joy right now. He's easy going and fun. He can communicate and reason. It's been a great season together.

So that has been our fall - it's been a beautiful season in both the literal sense and the this time of our life sense.

A Real Mom

Despite my rather pregnant belly and my daily workout of chasing a two-year-old, there are still times I don't feel like a real mom. I sometimes say the wrong thing, I forget to remind the kiddo to wash his hands, I don't care if his clothes are stained and we stopped for chicken nuggets and fries on the way home from the zoo today. I suspect a real mom would always know just the right thing to say and would be prepared with antibac for hands, a change of clothes and a packed nutritious lunch.

Then today Milo came running out of his room at nap time with a stricken look on his face and his most favorite friend Baby Bunny in his hand. In his other hand was Bunny's ear. I tried to stay calm, but in my head I was screaming OMG Baby Bunny is DEAD. I gently took Milo's hand and got him back in bed. I told him I would take good care of Bunny while he slept and Bunny would be all fixed when he woke up.

Being the only person home, it was up to me to perform the Bunny surgery. Even though I briefly thought of taking Bunny to my own Mom and having her do the stitching, I knew I was the one who would find the needle, thread it and make Bunny as good as new. Milo was trusting me to make everything better because that's what moms do.

The stitches are neither small nor even, but the ear is back on and Bunny looks almost back to normal. When Milo wakes up from his nap, he'll have his best buddy back to cuddle with. And I'll have the realization that maybe I am more of a real mom than I thought.

Busy? Yep.

As I am listening to the sounds of very silly and very happy laughter waft down from before bed stories (it's 10 p.m. - go to sleep already!), I am reflecting on how crazy our lives are, but how much fun too.

I am also designing either Halloween or Thanksgiving cards on Snapfish. I can't decide between the two holidays. On the one hand, we have much to celebrate and be thankful for and Thanksgiving seems the more momentous of holidays. On the other hand, I love Halloween and it seems the more lighthearted of the holidays. We are certainly lighthearted.

Summer has come and gone in a blur and Autumn promises to be just as busy. By the time Christmas rolls around, we'll be ready to welcome our new addition. It all seems so fast and yet there are so many sweet moments making up our days. Hugs and kisses and tickles and giggles. Sometimes I want to freeze time and other times I want to speed it up. And sometimes I just want to take a nap.

Labor Day Thoughts

This Labor Day has dawned cool and cloudy, which is a big change from just Saturday where we were happily splashing in the water on a 90+ degree day. I guess summer really is giving up her fight and moving on out. I usually love Autumn - the cool days, fun activities and sweet tastes are right up my alley. This year, however, I feel myself holding on a little more to summer and not quite ready for it to end.

We've had a great season of vacation and play dates in the park. Of family walks in the evening and ice cream cones on the playground. We've blown bubbles and played in the sand and just enjoyed the time spent together.

I know summer will come again and we'll find new delights, but this is the end of this summer, this season marked by just one toddler boy. I'm not totally sure what our life next summer will look like - we'll have a three-year old getting ready for preschool and an infant just learning to sit up. I'm sure it will be sweet, but it won't be quite the same.

So tonight, we'll pull our camp chairs around the backyard fire pit and talk about our favorite things of this summer and what we're looking forward to doing in the next season.

Boys, Boys, Boys

Last week's (actually, two weeks ago, eesh time is speeding by) ultrasound revealed there is a healthy, flexible and quite possibly stubborn little boy growing in my belly. My little yoga baby was curled up with legs crossed in lotus position facing my back and unwilling to move around. We couldn't see much other than his spine, but at one point the technician could get a clear indication that the baby was a boy. Next month will be another ultrasound to just make sure everything we couldn't see (heart, brain) is looking good. We'll get confirmation of the boy parts then, but I am not expecting it to change.

I wasn't surprised to hear the baby is a boy, but it still threw me for a loop. On some level, I thought since I already have a boy that I would just naturally have a girl next. It clearly doesn't work that way. I'm also not disappointed to be having a boy. I love being a boy mama to Milo and can't wait for this little guy to join in on our adventures. And I have a feeling there are going to be plenty of adventures waiting for my little men and me to discover.

A Lost Balloon

I have found that good days often follow bad days. Yesterday was a tough day. It had me Googleing search terms such as "2.5 year old doesn't listen" while Chris put Milo to bed. My searches suggested this is a totally normal phase and setting clear boundaries should help. I went to bed after reading that.

The extra sleep must have helped because today was much better. We visited a new park, had lunch out and Milo even did great getting a haircut. Then on the way out of the car to go in the house, Milo let of the string to the balloon he got at the haircut place. We watched it float away into the sky and then the tears started. Real, wet, large tears streaming down his face. Accompanied by screaming that he needed his haircut balloon back. We held hands as we set off down the street to look for the balloon. I, of course, knew it was gone, but Milo held onto hope that we would find it. At that moment, I would have given him 100 white balloons with blue ribbons, but he only wanted his one and it was gone.

I'm sure there are all types of metaphors I can draw on for the lost balloon: freedom, innocence, childhood itself. But sometimes a lost balloon is just a lost balloon. And sometimes it reminds you that good and bad days happen, but ultimately everything just floats away.

Things I Have Been Neglecting to Blog About

• The baby I'll be having in January.
• The small amount of uneasiness I am feeling about most likely finding out the gender of this baby in two weeks.
• What a super (and busy) summer we are having.
• The (sorry) state of our garden this year.
• How my yoga training program is going.
• Books I have read.
• Things I have cooked.

Now that I have a list to work off of, I'll try to get back in the blogging game.