Friday, April 3, 2009

And Baby Makes Three

This week Chris had to leave town to attend a funeral. Milo and I headed to my parent's house and although I had plenty of expert help from Grandma, I had a small taste of what single motherhood would be like and I was not impressed.

Years ago while in grad school, at the height of my I-am-a-strong-woman-and-can-do-anything-on-my-own phase, I remember thinking that should I not be married by 35 (oh the horror), I would just have a baby on my own.

What I failed to realize then was that being a single mother would not be the best choice for me or for any child of mine. In these two quick weeks (and the 9 months leading up to this), I have discovered that part of the fun of parenthood is watching your partner become someone else, someone better. Chris, while still my husband and best friend, has become a great dad and it's been so gratifying to watch him nurture this little being whom we created together.

Everyone who meets Milo agrees he's an adorable, good-natured, sweet baby, but I think it is only Chris and me who really appreciate our little guy. How sad it would be to not experience that connection with another person.

Then there is also the practicality of doing this on my own. It would be hard and a lot of work. It would mean long nights spent alone with a crying baby. I would be lonely if I were doing this alone.

Deepening our partnership to become parents and expand our love to another person has been one of the best and most surprising side effects of having a baby. The family we have quickly grown into simply takes my breath way sometimes and doing it together makes it so much more real.

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